Self-sabotage

Self-sabotage refers to behaviors, thoughts, or actions that hinder one's own success or well-being. It involves creating obstacles that prevent individuals from achieving their goals, even when they consciously desire those goals. This often stems from underlying feelings of low self-worth, fear of failure or success, or a need to maintain a familiar, albeit negative, pattern. These self-defeating actions can manifest in various forms, from procrastination and avoidance to destructive relationship patterns and substance abuse. Often, the individual may not fully realize they are engaging in these behaviors, leading to frustration and a sense of being stuck.

Self-sabotage meaning with examples

• Despite having a promising job interview lined up, Sarah stayed up late the night before, resulting in her being tired and unfocused. She arrived late and unprepared. This self-sabotaging behavior, driven by her anxiety about the interview, significantly decreased her chances of success. She later regretted the night of Netflix and snacks.
• John, a talented writer, consistently procrastinates on his novel. He fills his days with other tasks and then when he finds time to write, he quickly comes up with another task to accomplish. This self-sabotaging behavior is fueled by his fear of criticism, so he never lets himself get it perfect.
• After promising to go to the gym every day, Maria skips workouts in favor of watching TV. Her lack of discipline makes her self-sabotage her health goals, and the cycle begins again. This self-sabotage is the result of her lacking self-esteem. She knows she is the only one that can change this behavior.
• Even after a series of successful dates, David would intentionally bring up his past relationship problems, scaring potential partners away. This is an example of his self-sabotaging fear of intimacy stemming from a childhood trauma. He was scared of the emotional vulnerability of a relationship.
• Jane, a naturally gifted student, would intentionally start studying for exams the day before the test, preventing herself from reaching her full academic potential. This self-sabaging habit was derived from her unconscious fear of success. She feared that if she got too smart, she wouldn't be like the other students.